The light

I have been so cornered and covered in the darkness of his shadow that I didn't see there's a light shining behind him. Where are you my light? Wonder if you still shine as brightly as you used to be. Wonder if you would still bring warmth to me in your smile like you used to. Wonder if your eyes would be as kind as it used to be. If ever a day I would see you, will you be my light again...

I will be there

, he said. Someone who you have fallen in love with before and still somehow in love with after so many shits he made you go through. Well, vice versa that is the fact.
One day, he said, "I will always have a special place for you in my heart. I may fall in love with another girl, get married and have kids. Live like I am truly happy. But, once you call on me, I will leave everything behind in a second and just be with you. If you ever have a change a heart, I will be there. For now, forever and always. Then, I will be then truly happy."
Will what he said actually make you feel happy or sad? It's bittersweet. A love put in a most wrong way.

World....

Living in this world, this particular little city that only reeks of busyness. Where everyone seems to be in a hurry, running after that money, the ones that crawled in like a snail, yet hopped out so fast like bunnies. Why is that people chase no end of the dollars. Always thought that if human cant get hungry, probably no one will ever work. Changed my words for a little bit now, it's for pride, ego, the strong desire to be popular, famous, or infamous, that hungriness (for food) has become secondary. People would rather starve and buy luxurious things now.
No peace.
Sometimes it's nice to have people say it's allright after u bumped into them in the mrt. Instead of glaring at u like u have taken away half their life. When that happened, im never upset. Im just feeling sorry for them. Well, maybe it's monday blue.
With the adult uttering vulgarities and the kids spewing out much worse, can't help but wonder what is the rest of the society has been doing. Can't help but wonder when does it change into this way? Was it gradually seeping in unknowingly? Or did we ignore the signs?
Sigh, on the mrt now, letting my thoughts run wild...

What will?

Sitting by the sea side, watching the little cloud in the otherwise dark sky changed its shape. Saw the shape of a horse turning its head back. Now it has changed into the map of Australia. Bitter, life was so easy back then.

Life as a woman ain't easy, from being a daughter, a sister, a girlfriend and to a wife. Every phase has its traumatising moments. And it never ends.

The more I see a marriage the more I am terrorized, even before I jumped into one. All the whys and whats. Every family has its own book to read, different problems, even the happiest the family has their darkest secrets. Nobody knows.

So what will actually drove me into a marriage? Love? With all the crap of unsincere blokes out there, I don't think so. Age? Nahh, who cares, at the end of the day it's your life, your happiness. Then tell me, what will?

Back to my youth

Finally got a chance to revive my youth last night after a visit to Titanium. Apparently it's the club's last month in operation. My first and last time there perhaps. Met great singers like Qiqi and Sky, both have amazing vocals
I must say. Qiqi is an upbeat and outgoing girl, sociable and sweet. Her voice blew me off as she rendered qi qing liu yu beautifully. Sky was rather quiet and shy. I was wondering who he was when he sat at our table, a friend as Younis said. Rather surprised to see him singing on stage and isnt he a performer. Both received rave reviews from the audience, apparently they used to sing at Lunar. I would love to watch their performance again soon!!
Didnt realise I missed clubbing and dancing so much until I sat drinking, behind me were the basses. I absorbed the feeling of my heart thumping as the basses beat. Oh my, what a revelation - great feeling as if someone who has been deprived of her addictive drug and had it that second. I closed my eyes and saw my youth flashed back right there and then. Well, it has been at least a year since I danced into the wee morning like that. Euphoric!

Bangkok!

Just came back from Thailand last week. First time to Bangkok, ever! It was a great experience to be there, city of smiles? they say. Well, first thing first, the way Thai speaks is ever so gentle, it's 200 baht madam! is most of the things I heard over there. Clothes there are freaking cheap, amazing.

Thought bringing my DSLR will allow me to capture more photos, apparently I gave up after a night lugging it around. Kept it in the hotel safety box so I can bring more stuffs in my bag and carry all the shopping baggage. It's simply awesome, went to Millenium, Jatujak, oh so awesome, the doggie heaven. Too bad there's luggage limit, if not we would bring the whole Jatujak back!

At the Airport, waiting for our stuck luggage for an hour! What a start...

The famous Erawan 4 Face Buddha Temple

A crowd of worshipers on Thursday night

A Beauty

  

Dancers to help prayers

Bangkok Street at night

Elephants worshipers bought to write wishes, etc.
Bosses bought 4 of them as they said their wishes came true and they are returning their prayers.

Seafood!

Famous roadside eating place in Chinatown

Chinatown at night

Emoo

Uncle Bert always said we can't say this word emo as only Bimbos use it. Makes me feel like huh?!
Sometimes felt that bimbos has the better part of the world, not knowing anything, oblivious to their surroundings, but can they feel love, too? I don't know, just rambling here...

Anyway, felt like leaving on a jet plane! And I am leaving on a jet plane on thursday or rather a boeing 777 to Bangkok!
Fully paid by my most of the time lovely bosses, seriously they are lovely bosses. First time to Bangkok, can you believe that? Gonna shop and shop and eat and eat!

Sherina Munaf - First and Last Love
Translated by Yours Truly M.M.

At first there wasn't anyone able
to keep me hanging on
in times of sadness

At first I locked my heart
just for me and myself alone
now that you are here,
it seems that my worry and my loneliness tears are gone

reff:

You made me ask
You made me find
About this feeling
I can't understand
Would it be the same
if it wasn't you
And then your smile made me realise
that you are my first love and my last

At first it wasn't easy
to even smile in this life
that is full of darkness

At first there wasn't a need
to share as no one would understand
now that you are here,
it seems that my worry and my loneliness tears are gone

repeat reff

If there comes a day you would leave
Please don't force me to find a better one
As your smile made me realise
that you are my first love and my last

repeat reff